Welcome to Week Three of the 2015 edition of The Hoser's NFL Picks, where due to the constraints of life, it's mainly just the picks this week.
Philadelphia (+2.5) at NY JETS (47): Another tough D means another L for Philly. Jets 23, Eagles 20.
New Orleans (+7.5) at CAROLINA (43): The coverage could be just as shitty as Verizon's and Luke McCown still couldn't solve it. Panthers 20, Saints 10.
Jacksonville (+13.5) at NEW ENGLAND (47.5): Just about every time I think the line is too big in a New England game, turns out it ain't. Patriots 34, Jaguars 13.
Cincinnati (+2.5) at BALTIMORE (44.5): Normally I would think this is where the Dalton Gang gets shot down, but 37 to the Raiders? Bengals 22, Ravens 20.
Oakland (+3.5) at CLEVELAND (41.5): Really? Back to Josh McCown? Browns 23, Raiders 22.
Indianapolis (-3.5) at TENNESSEE (45.5): The Titans looked terrible on the deep ball last week, and that was just the Browns. Colts 30, Titans 20.
Atlanta (-1) at DALLAS (45): Pretty much a coin flip, but Bryant and now Romo? Actually, yeah. A bunch of handoffs, Weeden throwing to his TEs and the Falcons also down an RB adds up to the home-field advantage winning it. Cowboys 23, Falcons 22.
San Francisco (+6.5) at ARIZONA (44): Which 49ers team shows up this week? Does it matter? Cardinals 31, 49ers 17.
Chicago (+14.5) at SEATTLE (44): You know things are bad when you are wishing Jay Cutler was dressed. Fortunately for Jay, he gets to sit this one out against what we're guessing is an extremely upset Seattle D. Seahawks 27, Bears 16.
Buffalo (+3) at MIAMI (44): This is Sexy Rexy, no other reason. The Dolphins - who can get excited about them? Their mascot should be a piece of dry white toast. Bills 23, Dolphins 20.
Denver (-3) at DETROIT (45.5): People interested in this game are focusing on the wrong quarterback. Peyton will be fine, even if he has to underhand the ball to his receivers. No, is it time for the Lions to move on from Matthew Stafford? Who wouldn't have great numbers with Calvin Johnson? Broncos 24, Lions 17.
Kansas City (+6.5) at GREEN BAY (49): If you look up the phrase "by default," it should simply say, "The Packers winning the NFC North in 2015." A North Korean election is more competitive. Packers 26, Chiefs 20.
Pittsburgh (-1) at ST. LOUIS (47): Steelers 26, Rams 20.
San Diego (+2.5) at MINNESOTA (45): Vikings 22, Chargers 17.
Tampa Bay (+6.5) at HOUSTON (40.5): Buccaneers 19, Texans 17.
Lock of the Week: Arizona
Trifecta: Arizona, Indianapolis, Tampa Bay